One week has passed after the 14th Malaysian General Election. Life just goes on as normal, but I have a lot of things to express, from my thoughts of the current politics and also sadly, how I left a whatsapp group because of differing views. I will try to break this down.
1. New Government
Never in my mind I would expect Pakatan Harapan to win. With all the dirty tactics that Barisan Nasional tried to implement from gerrymandering, delay of postal votes, to putting the election day in the middle of week (Wednesday), I did not expect a massive change. After all, the evil can still reign and it was only one day it will fall. I never expect them to fall in this election. I am very idealistic and even felt cynical before that.
I remember watching one of Hannah Yeoh’s cantonese interview somewhere (will link it back once I can find it). She said along these lines, “You say that we don’t have Malay support, we have Dr. Mahathir. You say that Pakatan Harapan do not have the Muslims to support since PAS came out on their own, but we have Parti Amanah.”
On the hindsight, Hannah Yeoh was correct.
What do I personally think about this? I am still doubtful about Mahathir. While it is too early to see immediate effects of the changes yet, I am not even sure if he will still rule with an iron fist. Maybe he will get things back into place for good impressions but will it turn bad after that?
There are many perspectives about Mahathir being back in power, but I am taking the idealistic route now, which is good that Mahathir is back as a Prime Minister because Pakatan Harapan people are noobs as a new federal government, with the exception of Anwar Ibrahim. I don’t have high hopes after Mahathir steps down or passed away, because I am doubtful about Anwar being a Prime Minister. In fact, I would prefer Kak Wan to be the Prime Minister but we have are still conservative. Maybe in the next 4-5 elections we will get a new female Prime Minister?
I also hope Pakatan Harapan stop accepting frogs just because you need the numbers.
2. Leaving a friend whatsapp group due to unverified election news
2.1 Pre elections
It’s been a confusing time for me emotionally, but I have to leave this group because I had enough of nonsense to deal from one of the member of the group. Also, most of us have moved on in life and I am not getting the support that I need especially in a decision that I have made 2.5 years ago.
When we were in university, we were a group of seven. Eventually we became a group of six, when two of them did not meet eye to eye. After that, we became a group of five when another one went back to Perak.
Because of this arrangement, we have two university friends’ whatsapp groups. One group is for the five of us who are still here, and the other is for the six of us, including the one who is in Perak.
One of the person in the group, let’s call him Coby. Coby is very emotionally charged person. In fact, I would say we are similar because both of us are very emotional, and we let emotions get into our way too much sometimes. However, one thing that I cannot agree with Coby is his lack of thought to verify news before spamming the messages. Whenever the petrol prices goes up, he would spam the group of six and went on ranting about the government. Once he even forwarded news that were outdated and I told him to find for verified news instead of spamming, and he was giving monosyllabic defensive answers.
It happened two more times, and after discussing with my husband, I silently left the group one month after his spammy petrol increase posts. My husband told me that if I left the group when he was still ranting, it will be viewed as reactionary. After all, I still have the other uni whatsapp group and I will still have updates there.
However, I sense the emotional hostage that was being done in the group again. A few months before the elections, we planned a meetup and Coby decided to bring the attention to himself again, forcing the group to meet in his timing while inconveniencing others. This time, I took the indirect approach to tell him off because I realised that my direct approach sounds like an attack. He managed to cool down and I thought that was the end of the emotional manipulation.
2.2 Post elections
Coby started to spam the group with the election updates and some were unverified. I took one of his photo told him it was fake, and I linked it to prove my point. While he acknowledge it was fake but he said he was correct in other news and kept forwarding unverified forwarded news from whatsapp into the group and sadly, the others in the group actually started to believe those news and got emotional over it.
I have tried telling Coby directly and indirectly to send verified news but I know it will fall on deaf ears. After all, I did say in the earlier paragraph that I can be emotionally charged too. Also, I have said what I have needed to say and I do not want to argue with him at his level.
I thought of leaving the group but spoke to it to my husband to filter my thoughts, just in case. Coby did his tirade again, I just thanked them for the election updates and told them to add me back to the group on Monday. It was reactionary, but it was a long time coming.
It’s Wednesday today and no one added me back to the group. I have thought it through and I am prepared that I won’t be added back nor I will beg them to add me back. If I ever beg to be added back, that’s very manipulative of me.
After this long grandmother story, here is why I have left the group:
Different directions in life
I was able to hang out with them before because we were all in creative fields and dealing with clients. This changed when I decided to pursue my masters. As much as I want to be normal like them, but masters has changed the way I think, and no matter how much I try to be normal like them, I can’t. Doing masters in Art History has enabled me to look at things in different perspectives and I have learnt to question the status quo. I have learnt from academics is to use and cite verified sources even if I have differing views from others. The downside of using and citing verified sources is everyone have their biases. My approach to this is, I show you sources, up to you to take it or leave it. I won’t even argue it, because I will end up being a fool. But I have tried to tell Coby many times and it did not work, the only way was to leave. After all, the group is not adding value to my life.
Stopped playing nice
When we were younger, we will always try to be nice and tell each other to be tolerant to each other. Well, I have reached my limit and I have been friends with them for more than ten years. I have already seen the subtle signs of my friends moving on. I can manipulate the friendship, but I guess it is time to move on. It’s quite sayang, but to be honest, the common things between us is getting less and nowadays we plan meet ups separately instead of being in the group. Quite sayang la… but it’s time to move on. My phone number is still available for them to contact me.
3. The final thoughts
Sharing something from FB that I think reflects some good “food for thought”:
1) Just like many democracies, most voters don’t think for themselves but just follow with anger. Fake news was widespread on both sides even amongst those considered to be educated. Ignorance means voters will be manipulated easily based on emotions.
Solution: Read widely and think before you forward. Don’t forward stuff that you cannot verify or confidently say ‘I stand by this’. If you can’t stand by it and simply use ‘fyi, but I dont know’, then you are the root cause of issues as well
2) Understand the constitution, the law and the technicalities
Many don’t understand or remember concepts on government and jump to conclusions. For example, the formal way to seek consent from the Ruler to form the government.
Solution: Read up and understand the voting process, the formation of government, and the mechanisms of governance
3) Be empathetic
Understand that those who campaigned and voted and lost are fellow Malaysians. They had their reasons and many are legitimate, particularly around rural development. Many urban voters can’t relate to it because they don’t come from the same backgrounds.
Solution: Recognise that there are reasons why people have different political opinions and don’t rush to condemn the opposing views
4) Be magnanimous in victory and be kind
UMNO, Barisan Nasional, the caretaker Cabinet and previous PM Najib have accepted defeat with grace. At least, give them sufficient respect and dignity to transition out peacefully. Amidst all their faults, they have also done good work. Recognise that.
Solution: Treat your opponents as how you would like yourself to be treated
In short, we are still far from a mature and informed public even in urban environments. There is still a lot of education to be done and it is up to a responsible government to educate all sides. That is why the study of history and context is very important to create a mature and rational pool of voters.
Nonetheless, election season is over. There is hardwork to be done by both PH and BN, both with the intentions of building a better and more prosperous country for all.
Source: Warren Leow https://facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10101136170038301&id=37004913
And I will end with a Bible verse which is a reminder for me:
4 Don’t answer the foolish arguments of fools,or you will become as foolish as they are.5 Be sure to answer the foolish arguments of fools,or they will become wise in their own estimation.
Proverbs 26:4-5